warning labels for thieves/snoopers

A couple years ago, I was gone for spring vacation and I had noticed that some of my stuff was not how it was when I came back. Obviously, as this is my reaction to most things, I was pretty peeved. What irritated me even more is that this person went through my box of tarot cards which seriously IS NOT COOL.

So being the vindictive bitch that I am, I put a note in the box for the person to see if they decided to snoop through my shit. This is what it says:

Hi. These tarot cards belong to Rachel. If your name doesn’t match mine or you aren’t in my presence, I would like you to close this box. Quit snooping through my shit! I WILL find out. That is all. Love, Rachel

That is where I got the idea for this post. Wouldn’t it be nice to put notes on things so people would think twice before looking or snooping through your shit? Here’s a couple more I came up with:

  • My dad is Croatian…who do you think started World War I? HUH?!
  • My relatives are in the mob. Have fun not getting whacked for the rest of your life. (The awesome thing about this is that it’s true muahahaha >D)
  • I’m a witch, a self-practicing witch. You see the tarot cards in my room? Those are mine. I can send a time traveling cybernetic demon to haunt your sorry ass.
  • My cat has back claws and a pissy attitude…for thieves especially. ME-OW.
  • The aliens that abduct me every night find my house with this *insert item here*. I call the little one Bitey.
  • Have fun with this haunted *insert item here*. I am pretty sure that the person who owned this before me died bitter and alone. She’s going to be haunting yo ass now.

About panthersofamerica

I am a crazed 26 year old who is mentally 7 years old. I love the internetz and making people laugh, so what's better than having a blog full of stuff that makes people laugh? Nothing, that's what I tell you.
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