movie review: soul surfer

Tonight instead of partying like a rockstar…like usual, I went to my PIC’s house to watch a movie. The movie I watched was called “Soul Surfer”.

IF you don’t know what its about, well, obviously, DUH, its about a surfer. That has a soul. So that means the surfer isn’t a ginger. Or a cartoon character.

ANYWAYZ. So this girl has like the MOST PERFECTEST LIFE EVVAR AND IS GOING TO BE A SUPER DUPER SURF STAR. Then like all movies like this, she gets her arm bit off by a shark that’s being a jag off. So then she has no arm.

So then movie goes on with her like surfing more, then she goes to Thailand and it kicks her right in the ass because she was being whiny and then she realizes that people have tons more worst since they like legit had nothing.

So she goes back to Americaland and is all like, yo, I want to surf again. Then there’s like these cut scenes of her working out like in one of those Rocky movies. Except its not Sylvester Stallone actin’ like a jag off and eye of the tiger isn’t playing. But it would have made it better if the eye of the tiger was playing. or that racks song i like. RACK ON RACKS ON RACKS, RACKS ON RACKS ON RACKS…yaaahhhh. 😀

Oh yeah and then there’s this bitchy girl in the movie that I didn’t like. She looks like this girl that I used to swim with my freshman year of college. But this girl actually talks and the one I know like didn’t talk, like barely. Side note, I just saw this girl’s profile picture on facebook, and I was like who is that old guy kissing her and then it came to me! ITS MY SWIM COACH.

Besides that strange conclusion that just came to me, this movie was alright. There was a lot of Jesus and praise the lord messages in it. They said this thing with and there were like “Jeremiah 3:12” and I was like OMG I KNOW HIM. And then I felt really special.

I would prolly give this movie a 7. But then when the shark attacked the girl it scared the shit out of me and it was kinda graphic for my five year old eyes. So I docked it to a 5. I would have made it lower but there was this really funny hipster guy in it. Plus Carrie Underwood has a hot husband…that sadly was not in the movie.



About panthersofamerica

I am a crazed 26 year old who is mentally 7 years old. I love the internetz and making people laugh, so what's better than having a blog full of stuff that makes people laugh? Nothing, that's what I tell you.
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