five things that don’t mix well

  1. Hard Cider and Brownies: So I go to the store tonight and I was like HEY LETS BUY SOME ALCOHOL.  So then I pick up a thing of Woodchuck’s hard cider.  Little did I know that it tastes like shit when its room temperature (okay MAYBE it said on the carton to make sure it was chilled but that’s besides the point).  So then my Mom is like “Rachel, are you hungry?” and I was like yeah Mom.  So then I ate this brownie.  Now I have this killer headache and my mouth tastes like bile.
  2. Men and Short Shorts: OKAY, there is an exception to this.  If you are over 6 foot and have a nice ass, then  you are exempt from this.  Everyone else, don’t do it.
  3. M Night Shyamalan and movies: Seriously, every fucking movie this man has made is complete shit.  Last Airbender?: Shit, that lady in the water movie?: Shit.  Every other movie besides Signs: Shit.
  4. Rachel and Mornings: I. HATE. WAKING. UP. PERIOD.  The only time that I am open to waking up is if a. i got enough sleep or b. its a weekend.  Any other time is just blah.  To add insult to injury, I have this thing where I hate talking in the morning, so that makes me even crankier when people are like “hahahahaha blah blah rachel heheheh”  Literally, I am just like STFU, n00b.  Okay, I don’t say that but I definitely think it.
  5. Cheese and Pine Trees: hahahahahahaa that’s just funny now that I think about it.  Cheese and pine trees, that makes no sense whatsoever.  Yahoo Answers, you make me laugh.  That’s almost as funny as foxy boxes.  FOXY BOXES.

About panthersofamerica

I am a crazed 26 year old who is mentally 7 years old. I love the internetz and making people laugh, so what's better than having a blog full of stuff that makes people laugh? Nothing, that's what I tell you.
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